Part 2: How to Overcome Perfectionism
We’ve covered some of the drawbacks of being a perfectionist. We’ve also touched on the differences between holding yourself to a high standard and expecting things that aren’t realistic. Again, there’s never anything wrong with doing your best. However, when it starts interfering with what’s real and what could be accomplished, you should take that as a sign of something more serious. Perfectionism can completely take over your life if you let it. It can cause problems in your career, relationships, and even with your own family.
Thankfully, there are things you can do to overcome perfectionism. With a bit of time, patience, and a commitment to move forward, you can create more manageable expectations for yourself and others and learn to enjoy your life rather than criticize yourself when things aren’t perfect.
Let’s take a look at some of the best ways to overcome perfectionism.
Look at Your Perfectionist Patterns
The first step in overcoming perfectionism is learning to recognize it in yourself. That includes diving into the thoughts and behaviors that set your expectations unrealistically high. It might seem difficult to do at first, so consider writing down those thoughts and behaviors as they come to you. Having a list of them can serve as a clearer picture of what you’re dealing with. It will help you understand how your perfectionism negatively impacts your quality of life. Sometimes, that’s the exact wake-up call people need to find the motivation to work through their tendencies.
Make Mistakes and Shift Your Focus
No matter how perfect you try to be, you’re only human. Give yourself permission to make mistakes. When you do, show self-compassion and kindness. You might find that you actually learn from your mistakes and end up being “better” at something the next time you try it. When you find yourself honing in on the negative aspects of things when something goes wrong or doesn’t live up to your expectations, try to shift your focus. Instead, pay attention to the positives. Find something to appreciate or even be grateful for whenever a negative thought tries to creep in. The more you focus on the positive things, the less overwhelming those negative thoughts will be.
Find Meaning
It’s not uncommon for perfectionists to go through the motions of their tasks with the sole goal of doing everything perfectly. Unfortunately, that causes all meaning to get lost. When you’re tackling something just because you want it done without making a mistake, there’s no enjoyment in that. It should come as no surprise why perfectionism causes such stress. The next time you do something, whether it’s a project for work or a task around the house, try to find meaning in your actions. Why are you taking it on? What will it mean to complete it? Why is it important to you? When you find meaning in the things you do, you’ll take some of the pressure off of your shoulders. You’ll realize that you can find greater fulfillment in recognizing the underlying purposes of your tasks and projects.
Seek Out Help
If you’ve been a perfectionist for a while, breaking old habits is not easy. However, you don’t have to overcome it on your own. In fact, leaning on some type of support and reaching out for help is often the best way to recognize unhealthy perfectionism patterns. If you’re really struggling to break the negative cycle of perfectionism, feel free to contact me and set up an appointment.
Therapy is a great way to discover the root cause of your perfectionism. From there, we can work on creating new habits and changing your mindset so that you can find freedom from unrealistic expectations. Schedule your free 30-minute consultation today!
